“But I want to do it this way!”
We’ll all heard that before. We’ve probably said before. Interestingly, this is something we often hear from children. In our yearnings, sometimes each of us revert back to infantile ways of thinking. We make the mistake of thinking that we get to choose exactly how things happen.
We do.
But there is a catch.
The catch is the Law of Singular Choice. The name is probably a bit dramatic, but it just means that there is a choice each of us face. If we understand this choice, and use it to our advantage, we can accelerate our personal growth, and actually change the quality of our lives by changing ourselves.

If we don’t understand this law, then like flotsam in the ocean, the waves of life will beat us against it unendingly. I believe this law to be unchanging. I would love to hear your opinion on it.
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Now let’s talk about the Law of Singular Choice.

The Law

When I was in High School, I played football. Just like most people at that age, it seemed like it was the most important thing in the world. For some reason, my value as a person was tied to how we played football. It seems silly looking back, because even back then, I never really watched football or paid much attention to it.
But I had to be worth something on the football field.
I remember that my junior year was maybe my most discouraging year playing football. I’m 5’6” and therefore was at somewhat of a disadvantage on the field because I was going up against people who were much bigger than me.

Because of this disadvantage, I worked very hard. Much harder than many of my peers. Even after all that work, I was still a second-rate football player. This is why I was so discouraged. For a while I stopped trying and I almost didn’t care.
I didn’t understand the Law of Singular Choice.
Now, what does my almost meaningless high school football career have to do with you?
Let me explain.
The Law of Singular Choice means simply that you, in the area of your own personal growth, have really one choice. You can choose the methods, or you can choose the results. You can’t choose both.
I’ve tried to think of instances where this doesn’t really apply. I haven’t been able to think of any, so I’d love it if you could and we could talk about it.
The reason I brought up my meager football career, is because I didn’t understand that because of the results I had chosen (being good at football in high school), the methods necessary to get there were more extreme than I was willing to take (working even harder than I was).

That’s what I mean. Many people want to choose the results and the methods. “I want to have a six-pack and eat cake every weekend.” Like a child, we want both things.
The problem is, by choosing the results we choose the methods. By choosing the methods, we choose the results. I use examples from the fitness world because they are so easy to see. The finance world offers similarly obvious examples.
“I want to be out of debt, but I also want to watch (and therefore pay for) Netflix.”
The Law of Singular Choice dictates that the results we choose requires we avoid certain methods and adopt others, and vice versa. This law should help you move yourself onto the path that takes you where you want to go.

Action Items

Usually, whenever I give action items, they are a few ideas to help get you moving. Today though, I really want to give you something you can take full advantage of. I want you to be able to use the Law of Singular Choice to your benefit today.
1. Think about this Law. The more you think about it, the more you’ll realize how true it is. Talk about it with someone close to you. Try and poke holes in the Law. If you do, share it with us on Facebook or Instagram. Let the philosophy of the law sink into your very nature.
2. Analyze your goals. Ask yourself, “Are my goals the results I want, or the methods?” If they are the results, than ask yourself what methods might be required to get you there. What methods will you be required to avoid to get there? If your goals are methods, ask yourself what results will they bring about. Are those results worth it? Write all of this down.

3. Take the goals you analyzed in action item #2 and break them down into smaller goals. Break those down into smaller goals. Break those down into methods. Find methods or tactics that you can do every single day. A to do list is the simplest form of your goals. Every single day should lead you toward those goals.
4. At the end of every single day, pull out your list of methods or tactics, your to do list, and evaluate them. Are these methods moving you towards the results you want? Are they simply the easiest methods. Most of the time, to get the results we want, the methods we have to adopt are difficult, uncomfortable, or straining. Are your methods making a difference?
5. Share the results you want with someone else or on social media. Show the methods you plan on using and ask for feedback. Let others know of the goals you have so they can hold you accountable and support you.
6. **BONUS** You don’t have to do this, but something that has really helped me is buying a small notebook to use as a daily to do list journal. It helps me direct every single day towards my goals. I got mine from Amazon, and they are really cheap. It helps me keep my thoughts aligned with what I want to do. Try it out, or find a way that works for you.

Conclusion and a Caveat

Now that you are aware of the Law of Singular Choice (still not sure if I like that name), it will pop up everywhere. Whenever someone near you complains, or you complain, you’ll realize that that person is probably just trying to choose both the results and the methods. You’ll probably take an interest in analyzing how you think about your actions. You might try to make yourself avoid the easier methods in favor of the harder methods.

There is a slight caveat though. The hardest methods don’t always equal the most desirable results. Focus on what gets you to your goals. Sometimes the methods and the results are both pleasant. Sometimes they aren’t. Just make sure to focus on the big picture.
Now go and obey the Law of Singular Choice, and get the results you want.
I’d love to hear what you thought about this post. It was slightly different so I’m interested to see how people take it. Share your thoughts with me on Facebook or Instagram. Sign up below to get new updates on the Hard Thing Podcast.